Here we (me) are yet again, tired af and off my regular programing, but what a joy it is to be where I am. I feel so at ease and comfortable when I travel that it convinces me I need to move to where ever I am immediately. I think I spent about 6 waking hours in Kuala Lumpar in March and was like “hmmmmm…” But in all reality, its a rich European husband for me, so if you know anyone….. (will also take rich European wife).
What have I been up to lately?
Oh not much / hanging in there / traveling all over the world / dealing with the loss of friendships / walking my dogs / making it happen / making up for lost time / doing it for the plot / taking cooking classes / doing crafts/ making mocktails / starting a dinner club / going to brunch / moving up in Pilates / making the best of things / making a night of it / hanging in the park / watching Sex & the City reruns / making out / making it up as I go / making time for the people I love / making the most of nice weather / drinking wine / rearranging my apartment / eating the bag fries / trying new hobbies / laying on my couch / stepping it up at work / crossing off my 300 by 30 bucket list / eating pastries / making new friends / going to the Eras tour (yes again) / making menus / making memories / updating my laptop / making art / making progress on my reading goals / obsessing over socks / staying hydrated.
Some things I want to say:
Your double standards are actually so funny, I’m literally laughing SO hard. The drama is literally ridiculous and I wish you’d grow up. Why won’t you call me? Hey quick question- are you fucking kidding me? So like, where’s this all supposed to be going? Relationships are incredibly nuanced and everyone who has “picked a side” in this is honestly an immature baby and future me will be glad to no longer know you, even though it hurts for now.
To remain tender is a gift.
I spent therapy today talking about no matter how far and how often I go, the desire to outrun my feelings persists and it feels like the only way to really move on is to shove it down into a brick deep inside of me. So here I am saying the scary stuff out loud in the hopes of keeping myself soft and tender. I’ll ignore the voice in my head saying “no, I’m not allowed to say that, no it’s not safe, no they’ll think you’re weird/doing it for attention/broken”. Taking deep breaths, taking walks, taking the time. Life is just humiliating myself over and over and learning to live with the inherent shame of being alive! Gotta do it for myself. So I’ve decided to carry some undying hope with me everyday, as a lil treat.
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One thing about traveling so much is I literally want to go home and just eat salad, I am so sick of eating out for 3 meals a day.
Eden’s Dream Summer Salad Recipe🥗 arugula
🥗 Heirloom tomato
🥗 cucumber
🥗 large flakes of parmesan
🥗 homemade croutons
🥗 pickled red onions
🥗 lemon juice
🥗 olive oil
🥗 balsamic vinegar
🥗 flakey salt
🥗 fresh dill
I will be making the above as soon as I get home / heirloom tomatoes are in season and will be eating it for the rest of my life. Probably with some protein. Definitely while sitting on my couch next to my dogs watching Sex & the City.
yours unfaithfully,
Eden
💕 The Things I Love 💕
bilar
fries from Max’s
the basil smash from Jojo’s
Phil’s walking Stockholm route
friendship bracelets from the Era’s tour
making new friends in a hostel